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I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Few women admit their age, few men act it.

If we aren't supposed to eat amimals, why are they made with meat?

Your kid may be an honor student, but you're still an idiot.

According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist.

Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them.

Forget about world peace... visualize using your turn signal.

WARNING: DATES ON CALENDAR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR.

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A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us, and who loves us in spite of all our faults.