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Top Ten Kitchen Sex Aids:

10. Barbecue tongs. (have no idea)

9. Ice cream scooper. ( )

8. Egg beater (don’t ask).

7. Spatula (for paddling).

6. Ice cubes. ( )

5. Hand mixer. (don't ask.....)

4. Rolling pin (for extra-adventurous girls).

3. Egg timer (to guard against premature ejaculation).

2. Chip clip (those big clothespin-looking things make great nipple clamps).

1. Crisco.

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