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Originally Posted by Alassë
...but i will not be bullied by the school or any other soul down that path until i have a clear understanding of his problem
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and that right there is why you'll get a better handle on it - whatever it is. (((hugs))) for being so tenacious and caring when it comes to your kids.
just for my couple cents...unless the behavior is totally inhibitive to at least a manageable existence, and social challenges are coped with in a safe, rational manor, i think it’s just normal behavior– the band of what’s considered normal and desirable seems to me to be getting smaller. and lil can probably back me up on this...(or not
)...but i also think that public and private schools are becoming less tolerant of the disruptive child and are often too quik to stamp 'em with a "special needs" and pass them off to another. they pass them off for lots of reason, and some of them are the right ones, but sometimes i think they get passed off because it's easier (and sometimes safer) to cordon every child who needs a extra help, supervision, or control...even if it's just a little extra. not to get too political but not only does it get parents off the backs of the teachers when the disruptive one is removed, it gets teachers of the backs of principals and superintendents, and it might get the school - in the long run - more money. at least in parts of the US it might. a school that performs better on tests (and if a teacher doesn't have to deal with a troublesome student, more prepaartion for testing can be done) and a school that has smaller ratios of reported incidents to students gets more funding. special needs classes are exempt from these requirements, so if you keep a problem child out of the surveyed classes and place him in the non-mandated classes, the school looks better on paper.
crappy way to think about edjumucation, innit?
and that isn't to say that the special needs classes are not mandated or monitored, they are. and special needs teachers often need more training and aides and they require some pretty special skills, too, but they are also being over run with mildly impeded students. not only does this detriment the child who ends up un-challenged and defeated by the system, it also takes away massive resources from the special-needs teachers.
sorry bout that^^
good luck, sister. (((hugs)))again for the whole fam-dam-ily, you'll get the better of this