A buddy fixing his credit problems.

You had to be there I guess. :p

My neighbor Frieda trying to pronounce the name of one of the Cubs' players. His name is Fukudome........... let's just say it came out sounding like she should've been bleeped. :rofl:

Issuing invitations to our beach house

My daughter asking me if she could stop being bi and just be a lesbian and me telling her that she can only be a hetro male because she is such a slob. :D

If I marinated any more meat, I'd need to become a vegitarian

My cat scaring the living hell out of a chihuahua. He was so incredibly proud of himself. :p

Soda :d

MA! :mad: It's ^^^ doing it again.

My mom. I was talking to her on the phone and she said to make sure to keep a good eye on Gabby, the mommy cat, because it's Springtime and she may want to get pregnant again. Then she said, "Oh well, I didn't mean that I think she's a floozy or anything." :roflmao:

i just heard the phrase "pain trickles up" and i am rotflmao

My dumbass roommate asking what I thought of the cologne he had bought yesterday, whether I thought it smelled virile. I can't say that cologne makes a man attractive to me.

the word fucktarded. :p

My grocery store sells jugs of sea water for 3$.

^^^ :roflmao: P T Barnum is loving it. :)

He must pray to the octopus deity.